If devotional life has ever felt harder than it should, I want to start by telling you something I wish someone had told me years ago:
Wanting God and struggling with a system are not the same thing.
A lot of women genuinely love God. They want to know Him, to feel close to Him. They want their relationship with Him to be real and growing.
And yet many of those same women quietly carry the feeling that they’re somehow getting it wrong.
Maybe that’s because most of us have been handed a similar picture of what spending time with God is supposed to look like. We hear advice about consistency, routines, journals, Bible reading plans, and morning quiet times. None of those things are bad. In fact, they’ve helped many people develop meaningful rhythms with God.
But somewhere along the way, for many of us, the method became the measurement.
Instead of seeing quiet time as one way to connect with God, we started treating it as the scorecard for our relationship with Him.
When we kept up with it, we felt successful.
When we didn’t, we felt guilty.
And that’s a heavy burden to carry.
When the Formula Stops Working
I know that burden because I carried it myself for years.
I desperately wanted a relationship with God. Not a religious routine. Not more information. I wanted the kind of closeness I saw in other people.
So, I did what I had been taught to do.
I started new Bible reading plans.
Bought new journals.
Created new schedules.
Started over more times than I can count.
Some of those rhythms helped for a season. But when they stopped working the way I thought they should, I found myself asking questions that may sound familiar:
What’s wrong with me?
Why does this seem easier for everyone else?
Why does this feel so hard for me?
My problem was never a lack of desire for God.
I was trying to fit relationship into a shape that didn’t fit me.
Guilt Is Not Grace
Can I just pause for a moment and speak directly to your heart?
I really want you to hear this. And if we were in a room together, I’d sit right in front of you, hold your face in my hand, look you in the eyes and say…
I want you to stop feeling guilty about what your relationship with God looks like right now.
Stop cringing because your quiet time doesn’t look like someone else’s.
Stop assuming that struggle means failure.
And stop believing that missing a few days means you’ve disappointed God.
And most of all… you are not broken. You are uniquely made.
Guilt is not grace.
That doesn’t mean growth doesn’t matter, or that discipline is unimportant. It simply means that shame is not the tool God uses to draw us closer.
His invitations lead us toward relationship, not condemnation.
And if you’ve been carrying guilt about your devotional life, maybe it’s time to set some of that weight down.
Devotional Life Is Bigger Than Quiet Time
One of the most freeing shifts in my relationship with God came when I realized devotional life is bigger than quiet time.
Quiet time can be a wonderful practice. But relationship with God isn’t confined to a chair, a journal, and a particular time of day.
It’s possible to meet with Him while you’re driving. Or folding laundry. While you’re hiking a trail or sketching in a notebook. You can connect with Him while you’re sitting quietly on your porch with a cup of coffee.
When your heart is turned toward Him, your whole life becomes a place where you can meet with Him.
I believe with everything in me (so, you’ll hear me say it often)…
Everything you do in pursuit of God is your devotional life.
Not because structure doesn’t matter. But because relationship is bigger than a formula. And because God is interested in much more than a single slot on your calendar.
You're Uniquely Made
For years I assumed something was wrong with me. Now I wonder how many women are carrying that same assumption.
Friend, you’re not broken. You’re uniquely made.
The God who created you also knows exactly how you best connect with Him, because He made you that way.
Some people come alive through deep Bible study while others connect best through journaling. Many through time outdoors, or creativity, or reflection, or conversation, or simply paying attention to what captures their attention throughout the day.
The goal isn’t to become someone else.
The goal is to discover how God uniquely designed you to relate with Him.
And that’s a conversation we’re going to keep having throughout this season.
What I Hope You Remember
- Wanting God and struggling with a system are not the same thing.
- The method is not the measurement.
- Guilt is not grace.
- Devotional life is bigger than quiet time.
- Everything you do in pursuit of God is your devotional life.
- You’re not broken. You’re uniquely made.
Try It This Week
Instead of asking: “How do I become better at quiet time?”
Try asking: “When do I feel most aware of God?”
Pay attention to the answer.
Not when you feel most productive or most spiritual. When do you actually feel aware of Him?
Just notice.
You might discover that He’s been meeting with you in more places than you realized.
A Question to Sit With
Where might you be measuring your relationship with God by a standard He never asked you to carry?
Continue the Conversation
If this resonated with you, here are a few ways to keep exploring:
🎧 Listen to the podcast episode
🌿 Join the Figs Community
Coming Up in This Series
- Quiet Time Is Not the Goal
- You’re Not Behind
- God Made You Uniquely
- Don’t Ignore the Tug
- Small Ways to Start
Hey there, friend,
If devotional life has felt harder than it should, I hope this encouraged you today.
Let’s cultivate a devotional life you love. Like really love. Because it is possible and it’s so much easier than you think.
Chat soon, friend.
~Rose
